Stress

It's two-thirty in the morning. Although there is no ticking clock, the computer's fan whirls away quietly in the dark. Even after the severe lack of sleep, the late-night clubbing on Saturday, and a long work day today, I toss and turn in my bed instead of falling smoothly into sleep. I try hard to find a comfortable spot, but when I do settle down, my mind inevitably drifts toward a worry that cannot be dealt with at the moment anyway. I should email my professors. Or talk to my advisors. Or apply to some more jobs. I should be planning out my week in minute detail, or reading up on how to drive a manual car. I should do laundry. I should buy groceries. I should... The litany is endless, and never mind that fact that some of the things are literally impossible in the middle of the night where I am.

What I really should do is sleep and to let my over-filled brain work its way through all the information from the day. I cannot, though.

It's been a while since I've been so stressed that insomnia has kicked in. At times like this, I just want to give up. Who cares about grad school anyway when so much money can be made in industry with a job (not to mention how expensive the applications are)? In fact, who cares about jobs at all when your parent is willing to support you, at least for several months? But as much as I'm tempted to give in and give up, I know that it would not make me happy. So I must forge on.

Though, brain, not at two-thirty in the morning, 'kay? Let's forge on after some sleep.